


fix me up (i don't wanna lose you)

by mel_writes



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/M, I cried writing this, What Was I Thinking?, juke, wish there was more fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-03
Updated: 2020-12-03
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:48:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,945
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27863318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mel_writes/pseuds/mel_writes
Summary: Julie and Luke have been together for two years and dance around the discussion of Luke's unfinished business, but when she finds a song he wrote, how much longer will that last?Or, juke and pain... thats it.
Relationships: Julie Molina/Luke Patterson
Comments: 6
Kudos: 92





	fix me up (i don't wanna lose you)

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! this is my first ever fic, not just for Julie and the Phantoms, but ever! I watched the movie Clouds for the first time a few weeks ago and couldn't help but notice how fitting the song "fix me up" is for Julie and Luke's situation. I recommend listening to the song while you read, I hope you enjoy!

Julie counted her blessings. It’d been three years with her boys; three blissful years full of music, hope and love. She’d almost let herself believe they wouldn’t leave her one day. She hated thinking about it, especially since she let herself give into her feelings for Luke two years ago. 

It had been almost too much to contain after their Orpheum performance. The heaviness of the night propelled their stronger connection - somehow stronger than what they had had before. Hardly a few months had passed before Luke found Perfect Harmony, a work meant only for her and her mind. He hadn’t known what to say; in his hands he had her confession, the demonstration that his feelings for her weren’t unrequited - she loved him. How did he get so lucky? What did he do to deserve an afterlife like this? Things in his life hadn’t gone how he’d wanted, yet now he had found a love like what he had with Julie, a love stronger than his love for music. To him Julie  _ was _ music - alive, powerful, hopeful, his heart.

When they decided to take that step, to make the best of what the universe had served them, they avoided the elephant in the room. The boys’ unfinished business. They still didn’t know what it was but every day they were able to be together as a band, Luke and Julie as teenagers in love, they didn’t question it. Now or never, right? 

But as years passed, this life together almost seemed too good to be true. He had everything he ever wanted and he was scared to admit it in fear of being ripped away from it. So he did what he does best and wrote all his feelings down. Just like Perfect Harmony had been a secret for Julie to keep, this song, these words, were for Luke and his heart only. He didn't want to scare Julie into thinking he was leaving anytime soon, at least willingly; he just needed to write it all down in case. In case he had to leave just like they knew he always would. She had to know he loved her and appreciated these moments with her. She needed to know that he wants her to move on, to live and not look back on their time with sadness but with contentment.  _ She had already lost so much. _

* * *

He’d been working on it for a few days, only getting a decent chorus and verse in, when it all came crashing down. It was after a successful band rehearsal, going over songs they’d written together throughout the years. Songs that are time capsules of their love, their connection. Julie was looking through his notebook in hopes of finding a lyric to spark inspiration for a new melody she had come up with. Luke had forgotten that the song was in there. He’d forgotten to hide it in the loft like he always did. 

“Luke, what is this?” Julie asked, her eyes consumed by the words on the page. He could see her brain working, her eyes, those brown, beautiful eyes, recognizing the meaning of the words he’d uncovered from the depths of his greatest fears.

“What are you talking about?” Luke retaliated. Maybe playing dumb wasn’t the greatest idea. His handwriting was one of a kind and he knew she knew what he’d written it about.

“Luke.” Julie replied deadpan. Her eyes lacked the spark they always had, instead there were tears building up. He hadn’t seen her this dejected since the night they almost crossed over, when she pleaded for them to join The Hollywood Ghost Club. 

“Look Jules, it's just something i’ve been working o-”

“Why?” Julie cut him off, “why do you need to work on this,” she pleaded. “I thought you guys didn’t know what your unfinished business was” she asked him. 

“We don't,” he responded. 

“Well this sure does sound like you do. Luke, this sounds like a  _ goodbye _ . Like you know you’re gonna poof out any second,” she explained with a fierceness in her voice to mask her hurt. 

“We don’t know that we won’t,” Luke said defeatedly. “Julie, I have everything I could ever want! Music, the boys, a family, you! We could cross over at any time, no matter how much we want to stay” he cried out. “We have to talk about it at some point!” 

“No, we don't! Why can’t we just live in the moment? Why do we have to think about the future when it means you leaving me?” she reveals. Luke reels back and swallows the lump in his throat. She had a point. 

“Julie,” he whispered as she looked down to avoid his eyes, “Jules, look at me.” She looked up at him through her lashes, but refused to walk towards him. 

“I can’t, Luke” she whispered back, her voice clouded by the strength of her tears. “I can’t think about it. I don’t want to think about it,” she revealed. 

“We have to,” Luke replied, trying to mask his upset, trying to be strong for her. “At least sing what I have with me”. Julie hesitated before wiping her tears and making her way to the couch. Luke followed her and handed her the song while he grabbed his guitar. It was hard to read the lyrics on the page with the glassiness of her eyes, but just the first lines were enough to send a fresh wave of tears down her face. 

_ Tell me something you never told before _

_ Before I walk through the door _

_ I adore you, I adore you _

As she started singing, her voice not as strong as it usually is, Julie couldn’t help but smile at the words he wrote for her. He responded with his lyrics, his voice matching hers in emotion, a smile gracing his face as he looked to her. 

_ I do _

_ I do.  _

_ Smile with me and cry with me  _

_ I won’t ever tell a soul _

_ Hold my hand, I’ll squeeze it back _

_ And i’ll never let go _

They stared at each other as they sang, conversing through the lines. Tears remained unshed in their eyes as they found strength in each other. In the words they shared. They sang back and forth, their desires for each other evident.

_ Never give up, never look back _

_ I won’t give up I’ll keep on trying _

_ Dry your tears up, all your crying _

_ Cannot, fix me up my darling _

At those words, Luke stops playing and wipes the tears that had fallen from Julie's eyes as he begged her to live her life after he was gone. They connect their foreheads momentarily, breathing each other in, finding solace in each other before they can continue unraveling their thoughts. Julie takes over the next part of the verse. 

_ Twisty, turning winding paths _

_ I could listen to your laugh  _

_ As we tiptoe down these humble truths  _

Their voices meet as the root of their problem arises. 

_ I don’t want to lose you. _

They continue the same pattern as they sing what Luke has written - she sings, he sings, she sings, he sings. 

_ Show me how to love deeper than the surface, I beg _

_ And you can show me what it means to have purpose _

_ And i’ll tell you again _

_ Never give up, never look back _

_ I won’t give up, i’ll keep on trying _

_ Dry your tears up, all your crying _

_ Cannot, fix me up my darling _

_ Fix me up, my darling _

They pause for a second, then Luke picks up the guitar from where he left off, at the end of the second round of the chorus. He plays the buildup of the guitar as they vocalize a simple sound that holds so much meaning.

_ Woah, woah, woah _

_ Hold on _

The words had run out on the page, but they had reached the peak of their confession. They had to keep going. Reaching for the pencil on the coffee table, Julie keeps writing, continues the thoughts and feelings pouring out of her. They write a guitar instrumental leading them into their bridge. A buildup of anger and tension, for it to end in hope and love. 

Without realizing, they work through the night. They find peace in each other's presence, the love they feel for each other enough to be vulnerable. At one point Alex and Reggie, previously roaming the Los Angeles nightlife, poofed in. They had gone unnoticed by the couple bouncing melodies and lyrics off of each other. When Luke and Julie wrote together it was like nothing else in the world existed. They didn’t need anything but the other in that moment. But this time, Alex and Reggie could feel something different in the room. There was a heaviness, an unspoken emotion ravaging the normally bright aura of the garage. This observation was confirmed when they saw the way Julie and Luke's hands shook as they wrote on a wrinkled page, as they leaned on each so they didn’t crumble underneath the weight of their shadow, as they shed tears they probably didn’t even realize they were shedding. At this sight, Alex and Reggie poofed back out, letting them be. 

As they were writing the last of the lyrics and figured out the orchestration of the guitar, the sun was peeking out of the horizon, illuminating the garage through the window, a glow casting down on Luke and Julie as they sat on the floor, leaning against the couch. The final lyrics flow as they speak the hardest words to each other. Julie pleaded with him to stay. Luke begged her to be ok with him leaving. 

_ Don’t you lose hope, the sky’s not falling _

_ Please just listen cause I’ll be calling _

_ Stay with me just one more moment _

_ I know you’re in pain, just please don’t show it _

_ One more moment, please _

_ It's too late I'm afraid I have to leave _

They repeat those last two lines until they feel satisfied with the power of their pleads. Until they are sure the other knows what they are thinking. Luke takes the next line, leading them into the final variation of the chorus. 

_ Promise me, promise me that you'll... _

_ Never give up, never look back _

_ I won't give up I'll keep on trying _

_ Dry your tears up, all your crying _

_ Cannot fix me up my darling _

_ Fix me up my darling _

* * *

Ray worried about his daughter. She had been ruined after her mother died, she had lost her love - music. But then her guardian angels, three random boys from Switzerland, swept in and brought his little girl back. The band had been a saving grace for Julie, without it, without the boys, who knows where she would be. 

Julie had been working on a song in the garage last night. Ray had gone to check on her at around eleven o’clock and let her be. She looked upset and he rationalized that writing down whatever she was feeling in a song would be good for her. Either way it was a weekend and there was no school tomorrow so he didn’t have a problem with it. Assuming she would go to bed whenever she was done, Ray went to sleep.

The next morning, he went to check on Julie in her room, only to find it empty. His mind immediately connected the dots, and he went to investigate in the garage. 

There she was on the floor, eyes closed yet still visibly puffy and red. She was in what would normally be an uncomfortable and awkward position, but she looked nothing but tranquil and calm. At peace. 

There was an invisible force holding her up. 

**Author's Note:**

> ... sorry.
> 
> This started out as an idea in my head, i usually just picture things as a scene and don't have the patience to write it out but for this one i was just like, screw it. These are the time stamps for how i imagined the scene playing out in my head in correlation to the song. 
> 
> 00:00 - 2:19 (Julie and Luke sing, its the same structure as the song)  
> 2:20 - 2:54 (The buildup is when Julie and Luke finish the song and Alex and Reggie poof it, kinda like a timelapse)  
> 2:55 - 3:01 (The sun comes through the garage window, similar to wake up, and it shifts to them sitting on the floor leaning on the couch)  
> 3:01 - end (Julie and Luke sing the rest of the song and fall asleep)


End file.
